A Week of Independence, Sleep & Unpacking....

Okay, so it's been a week. I have a small pneumonia and spent the weekend sleeping. Right now, I'm writing this entry AND uploading photos from my trip on to Webshots.com It's so much fun looking at these and seeing all of my wonderful family and friends and beautiful scenery. What a fabulous time I had and wonderful opporntunity I was given to go. AMAZING! Seeing ALL of Nevada between here and Reno and Northern California and Southern Oregon, wow, this will be something I will look back on when I'm old and gray. I feel SO much different now. I want to move to Oregon really bad. The weather here in Vegas is 115*, NO THANKS! I'm not going to hell, I live in hell. Just kidding, I know that's not really funny, but honestly, it's so freakin' hot here it's disgusting. We're shut in our own homes like it's a snow blizzard or something, I mean I like summer and heat and all, but THIS is ridiculous! LOL! I am trying really hard to LIVE in the MOMENT. But, I want to move SO bad. I am seriously thinking about going into Real Estate though and this coming fall, I'm enrolled at the local Community College for Math and English. I have to take those no matter what I later decide on. I have to have 35 college credits for a RE Lisence and right now I have about....more than that, but still, I need the Math and English regardless. Now, I'm trying to decide if I want to go to RE school here, or in Oregon. I know that no matter where I go, there's a HUGE market for RE out there and I think it'd be something I enjoy. My dad offered to help me out, which was really nice. I so enjoyed seeing him and gettin got know him. It's nice to know he's there and that I can depend on him. Anyhow, he was trying to talk me into moving up there with all of them. I DO want to move up there w/ them and be NEAR them, but I don't know about living WITH them. I love my family, but right now, at 21, I'd like to live my life for me. However, since I've been home I've been called selfish left right and sideways-and they're right. I'm really trying to work on that, being LESS selfish, LESS judgemental, more compassionate, MORE generous. I know I have a lot of great qualities about myself, but I can be pretty harsh, judgemental, and extremely selfish. But, at least I'm aware of it. Anyhow, I want to do RE b/c I think it's easy on the body, I might enjoy it and it's something that I think I'd be good at and could make a lot of money at. My dad's kinda mad that I am concentrated on money, but the thing is, I DO want money. I want it ALL. I want happiness, love, peace, joy, most of all HEALTH, my family, friends and yeah, money. Who doesn't? In this world it is SO expensive to live that it does take money to live comfortably. It's not that I think money rules and I KNOW it can't buy happiness, I really do, but I've lived paycheck to paycheck now for years and years and I'm already sick of it. I watched all of my parents be in debt up to their ass well into their 40s and I just don't want to be there. I want to be different. I want to get it together, financially, early in life. I'm willing to work hard now so I can play hard later. Anyhow, I know I'm totally jumping all over the place, but oh' well, I have a lot on my mind and I've wanted to write this entry for about a week, but was too tired and weak to do so. Right now, I am really enjoying my time alone and having my space and quiet. Mom hasn't been home much since I got home, she's hanging with Ricky, and that's okay, that way I know that when I move she'll be okay. yes, it wil be hard and I'm going to miss her SO much, but I CAN do it. I gained SO much self confidance and independene on this trip. I'm SO glad I did this. The hardest part about this however is impaitence. I want to RE NOW, I want to move NOW. And I can't, I have to wait and that sucks. But, I know in my heart that God has the plan in store and that as long as I follow Him, I'll be okay. Thanks to God for everything fabulous in my life! I need to get back to my photos, I'll write again asap. Bye for now!

Many Blessings,
SL