January 5th, 2010....a few days later!

The post below was originally written on January 5, but I didn't get around to actually posting it on Tuesday, so I saved it and am posting it now. Enjoy!

I found an interesting article online today. It was about 75 things that every man should own. It was interesting. One of them was a weekend duffel bag and below the picture of said weekend duffle bag was what a man was supposed to put in it. As I read the short list (much shorter than a woman's weekend bag for sure) it occurred to me that these items are exactly the things that my husband takes with him when we go away for the weekend. Seriously, except for the cotton blazer (he takes a blazer, just not a cotton one), my husband packs exactly the list below if/when we sneak away for the weekend. (Cotton blazer, khaki shorts, a leather belt, flip flops, white sneakers, swim trunks, a pair of jeans, 3 pairs of socks, 2 pairs of underwear and a razor). It's kind of creepy, actually, like, where did he learn that? How did he know? Sometimes he forgets the swim trunks, but usually, the contents of this list are exactly what you'd find his weekend get away bag--right down to the flip flops, white sneakers and leather belt. This list gave me a good laugh, that's for sure. The list of 75 things ever man should DO got me thinking. First, it got me thinking about how many of the things on that list Colin has already done, and he's just a few days short of 30 years. How a few of the things on the list would NEVER, ever be put on a WOMAN'S 75 Things To Do list, and then I thought "what exactly should a woman do? What do I think are 75 things a woman should do in life?" The first thing that came to mind is having a broken heart. That sounds sad, I know, and not very positive of me, but it's true. I believe that having a truly broken heart, over a romantic love gone wrong, or never happening at all, should be a requirement for growing up. Okay, usually it is. But, in all reality, I think having a broken heart (or two) is necessary for personal development, in every way--mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I remember reading an article about Sally Field a few years ago (she's always been one of my favorite actresses) and in that article she said that she's never really had her heart broken. I find that sad. Sure, broken hearts totally suck; you think you are (and sometimes want to) going to die. But in my opinion, if you haven't had your heart broken a time or two, than you haven't really lived--and you certainly haven't really loved. I'm not saying I want a lifetime of broken hearts, and it just breaks my own heart when I think of my little sisters experiencing their first broken hearts. But, still, it's something I believe we should all experience. It can change you and teach you so very much. Anyway, I want to work more on my list, but not right now. It's good food for thought though, what every woman should experience. Right now I want to talk a little about what I'm grateful for today: namely dark chocolate and pretzels. There are just certain foods that pair well together; peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter & chocolate (never one of my favorites), popcorn & butter (definitely one of my favorites), coffee & bacon, ham & cheese, peas & carrots...and dark chocolate and pretzels. Oh my goodness, there's just something delectable about them. The earthiness and hint of sweetness from the dark chocolate combined with the saltiness and crunchiness of the pretzel, oh Dear Lord, is fabulous! I'm definitely grateful for that today! That, and my new blue sweater, which is so soft & comfy I want to live in it! One of my favorite pieces of clothing I've ever owned, seriously. I'm also grateful for FINALLY winning a game of Baseball on the Wii yesterday--it took me like 10 times, and I only won by one point, but still, victory was oh so sweet! I really like the Wii, I feel bad saying that because it's so not like to me to LOVE video games and stuff, and the spiritual side of me is going "why on earth are doing that? How is that helping the world, Sarah? How is that contributing in any way to the betterment of society?" And the other side of me is going "you know what, it's just plain fun, I'm not hurting anybody, so who cares!" I'm really, really good at tennis, I lost 3 games today, but still, it's my best game on there! I used to rock at bowling, now, not so much. Oh well! Golf is pretty fun too! I really want to play Tennis and Golf in real life, and I've always liked baseball (I grew up playing it) so it's really cool to improve upon that! I like playing the Wii because you can't do it and something at else at the same time--it takes all of your attention and concentration, it's a total escape. Anyway, I'm also grateful for REAL Parmesan Regiano Cheese--the real kind, the good stuff--imported straight from Italy! OH my goodness! Wow, SUCH a difference, and Kraft has nothing on it, believe me! I'm grateful today for my husband, and for the gift of acceptance and our marriage. Not because it's easy or perfect, but simply because it is. I'm also grateful for my two best girlfriends, who I got to talk to back to back today, so that right there, made it a fantastic day! I'm also really, really grateful for my job, and particularly my bosses who had absolutely NO problem with letting me take the day off on Friday to attend Stephanie's funeral. That I'm really grateful for. I love my job; I'm so blessed to have it! I'm also grateful that I know how to tell time, can type really fast, can read, having running/fresh water to drink and also for hot showers, soap and Vera Wang perfume--oh it smells so good! :) This is a very hard time for Colin's family right now, and for me too, just because of that, but I'm still going to enjoy my life and celebrate it. It's too short not to. I am not supposed to go around saying that, according to my therapist, but too bad. I think there's a good balance between being too forthright and having no tact (perhaps I could use more of that lately when it comes to Colin), but I also am not going to apologize for what I believe in. And I believe in celebrating life, enjoying the day to dayness of it and being as happy as we can, as much as we can. It's not without difficulty or struggle, it's just, why not enjoy it? I'm not sorry for that, and I won't ever be. I went to therapy this morning and came out of there totally irritated, not because my therapist was wrong, but because she was right. Yeah yeah, I can't change anyone but myself, that's fine, I get that, and I can learn to live that, I know it, I just don't often live it (at least not within the walls of my own home), but what pisses me off is why aren't OTHER people working to change as well? Why am I the only one (not really the only one, but let me whine for just a second, please), doing the work to face my shit and improve myself? Just curious. Anyway, enough stinkin' thinkin'....I'm also grateful today that I can see, that I can see art and nature and trees, rocks, flowers, pinecones, colors, sunsets, the ones that I love. I really am so very blessed, thank You Lord for it all!

In Light N' Love,
-Sarah Liz :)