Today I Feel Better & I'm Considering Nutrition as a Career...

There may be more to learn from climbing the same mountain a hundred times than by climbing a hundred different mountains.
-Richard Nelson

Whoa, somedays just suck. Yestrerday, I was so depressed and messed up mentally and emotionally, and didn't feel good physically either...yuck, but today, I feel better....

I'm all positive and happy go lucky 29/30 days of the month, but there's that ONE day where life just GETS on my nerves! We've ALL been there, and some are there TOO often; I try diligently NOT to be one of those people. I used to think it was weak to complain, I used to think it made me un-strong and that I was ungrateful and a brat if I complained. Well, you know what, that's just plain false. I believe you HAVE to follow your heart; and sometimes, life gets tough and it's more than okay to admit that; it's healthy even.

We each have our own personal struggles; our trials and tribulations that often seem never ending....

Mine is my health; for 22 years, and especially the first four years and the last six months, I've been sick; battling physical symptoms and medical craziness....

HEALTH is MY mountain and I am learning new things as I make my 900th climb up it.....

I'm getting better at being in tune with my body. I'm becoming more interested in Nutrition and Organics and non-chemical ladden products. I spent the weekend at a health food store and online learning more about herbs, natural remedies, homeopathic remedies, and alternatives to prescriptions.

I found a great herbal compound that is BETTER than PepcidAC and the 100 other antiacids I've tried; seriously, guys, you name it, I bought it, got it, took it and ate it. Living with constant heartburn and nausea can make one a real brat. I also found a wonderful multi-vitamin with NO sugar or fillers or artificial chemicals; expensive, yes; worth every penny-without a doubt. You just can't put a price on feeling good, feeling normal and being HEALTHY.

On a side note......Rx's are things I'm really starting to disest, I believe it's a conspiracy in this country to get the WHOLE damn nation hooked on too many Rx's AND their multitude of side-effects so that we, as paitents, treat the symptom, but NOT the problem. If we continue ingesting our bodies with these lethal chemical compounds known as Rx's which have extreme side effects, we're just going to end up back at the Dr's office, trying to remedy a side effect and sicker than we were in the first place. I don't know why I just figured this out and I wish to God others would figure it out too. It's so common sense, folks, come on.....

that being said; there ARE SOME good Rx's out there, and being a severely sick person most of my life; Western Medicine has saved it time and time again. I would not be here if it weren't for CERTAIN Dr's, and their Rx's. Albuterol for instance (a fast acting asthmatic inhaler) has saved my life many times; Zyrtec was the ONLY remedy for my allergies until about a week ago (when I tried an herbal alternaitve). I'm not saying Rx's as a whole are bad, but I AM saying that as a nation, we are becoming entirely too dependent on them and I think it needs to be thought about and approached differently.

Mind and body have a serious connection, that's been proven, and for me, it's very real. But, I believe (and it's scientifically proven) that the foods (and beverages) we eat directly affect us in one way or another....Eating sugar for instance gives you a high, then makes you bottom out and feel tired and groggy; meat for me makes me feel like I have a rock in my stomach that's like a boat anchor pulling me towards the ground; on the contrast; FRESH PRODUCE and NATURAL INGREDIENTS make me feel revived, energized and alive.....I'm trying to learn more about....health food and the health industry has always interested me and I know it's a multi-billion dollar industry in the U.S. I'm sure it has its own pitfalls and faults, like anything else, but still.............

I'm seriously considering nutrition as a field of study, I think it'd be more fullfilling and satisfying than selling houses (I recently thought I wanted to be a Real Estate Agent). But now, I'm thinking the health care field is BOOMING and Nutritionist would be very interesting. I'd be able to help myself and others while earning an income and making a difference in people's lives. Sounds pretty good to me. At least I figured that one out. See, everything happens for a reason; had I not been this sick these past six months, I might not have ever thought about that........

Luckily for me, I'm a pretty happy and positive person, so my "down days," are just that; one day, if even that. Thank God for His Love & Grace & Understanding.

I went to the Dr's yesterday and she said that the abcesses in my throat were acne; I adore my Dr; I think she's a brilliant physician who knows me quite well and has done her homework with me; but she's still human, and as humans, we all make mistakes. I feel that although she's done everything right over the past two years she's been my Dr., this time, I think she's wrong.

I was reading about it online the other night and it said that abcesses in the throat that are consistent and painful are basically constant strep throat. I've had these abcesses my whole life, and while my skin does break out when I get them, I know for a fact what causes my skin to breakout otherwise. I've lived with acne for 10+ years and I do everything in my power to keep it under control as best I can....

but these abcesses in throat are NOT acne. It's something else, I just know it.

I am very in tuned with my body and I always say, "follow your gut," so that's what I'm doing.

I got a refferal to an ENT (Ear, Nose & Throat Specialist) just to be safe. I'd rather go and make a fool of myself than have something be seriously wrong and then be sorry.

What amazes me is how MANY people, especially Americans, do NOT take responsiblity for their OWN health. Yes, Dr's and Hospitals are great and they can be a great resource; but ultimately, just like everything else in life; it's up to us.....

WE ARE IN CONTROL OF OUR HEALTH, in more ways than we're aware.

I believe EVERY SINGLE THOUGHT affects us in a different way; and optimism has been scientifically proven to be healthful.....

I have been on a search for six months now, trying desperately to find out what's wrong with me. I've been from Dr. to Dr. to hospital to hosptial having test after test after test done and run. I've had x-rays, cat scans, sonograms, blood tests, MRI's, a minor surgery, and God knows what else since February 25th of this year. And you know what, I'm a bit tired of it all. Quite frankly, I'm PISSED off that NO ONE seems to know what the hell is wrong with me....

BUT, I KNOW that there IS something wrong. I don't think I'm dying and I do have good days where I feel pretty normal. But, pretty much everyday since Feb. 25th has been a crapshoot when I wake in up in the morning; do I have heartburn? Do I have feel nauceous? Does my throat hurt? Will my voice come out today? Are my allergies gonna act up? There's another abcess? Why am I so tired when I slept 10 hours? Etc, etc, etc.....

I KNOW HOW BLESSED I AM, and if you read anything in this blog you'll know that. I am not saying I am not grateful for what I have, because I am. I'm EXTREMELY GRATEFUL for ALL OF MY BLESSINGS; and they are definately plentiful.....

but that doesn't change the fact that I have generally felt like shit for six months now; SIX MONTHS! And enough is enough!

Today, I'm pissed enough to write about it and do something.

Yesterday, however, was a different story. I was so upset after the Dr's that I cried and cried and cried. Then, I spent the day in bed, sleeping, feeling like shit the whole way around, and being depressed. Today, though, I feel better. Thank GOD!

I allow myself that time though, to be depressed and mad and sad and angry and feel all those ugly things-then, I get up, get over it and get on with it!

Personally, I think it's a rather healthy attitude; and without it, I think I'd be in a looney bin by now. I mean, in all realtiy, I've been going to Dr's and hosptials and having surgeries and been sick my WHOLE life, that's almost 22 years now, same mountain, different day you know. I oughtta be used to it by now, and I guess in a way I am, but no matter what, it doesn't get easier.

I'm still blessed though and I'm happy to be here; walking, talking, typing, breathing, peeing, eating, seeing, hearing, singing and ALIVE! And that's what counts!

Thanks to God for EVERYTHING and the multitude of blessings you continue to provide me with each and everday!

Many Blessings to You All,
SL